As parents, we sometime chide ourselves for not giving our kids the same things we had as children. Some things are beyond our control, like grandparents living in different parts of the country, or even another country altogether. The world has gone through some changes since we ourselves were children, and our families certainly have gone through changes, so why would we think we should have the same family design as our parents did.
An example:
In my childhood household, my father would only have a live tree at Christmas time.
He detested even the idea of the artificial tree. We grew up thinking that we would give up gifts if it meant we couldn’t have a live tree. And it had to be the biggest floor to ceiling tree to be found.
In my own little family, though, we tried to keep up this tradition. My husband also preferred the real trees. I had learned, though, that there had been artificial trees for many, many years… They were feather trees, and other types of artificial trees, and many of those were tabletop trees.
I learned that Christmas trees in early years of our country were sold beyond Christmas, and into the New Year, because some folks couldn’t afford the trees until the prices fell low enough. Santa sometimes was delayed at poorer homes until late January! How many fires and injuries were due to having a real tree in the house and putting candles on it?
We had come to a point in our lives that we had very large active dogs, and a baby, and a collection of old ornaments that fit better on an artificial tree, as it had greater spacing between the branches. So we broke down and used a 5-foot artificial tree on top of a table. Guess what? We didn’t like it at first, but it was the best way to preserve the safety of the family, and we got used to it. It wasn’t as bad as we had thought it might be. Different wasn’t so bad after all.
How many families get into huge arguments over what traditions will be blended into their households? Each new family unit needs to allow themselves the luxury of forming new family traditions, and keeping the old ones when appropriate and agreed upon. I missed not going caroling (a childhood tradition with friends), but enjoyed celebrating the 12 days of Christmas (a newly adopted family tradition).
As a child we didn’t put up a Nativity, but in my own household, I had stumbled across an old handmade rustic “wood and stick” barn, and had assembled a variety of older mismatched figures from Italy, Germany, and France. We built up a great routine for the holiday season. Beginning shortly after Thanksgiving, the “day to day” portions of the Nativity were displayed, like the animals and the shepherds. As the month progressed, Mary and Joseph were placed far away from the Nativity, and moved a little closer day by day. Of course, Baby Jesus was not placed into the manger until Christmas Eve or Christmas Morning, and the Angels were now “round about”. Then we unpacked the 3 wise men, and they began their journey to bring gifts to the King, on Twelfth Night...the traditional day to take down the tree.
An interactive Nativity. We allowed our son to “play with” and rearrange the animals and the shepherds, but “Jesus” was not a toy. This was certainly different than my childhood, but it was definitely not wrong. We had hours of entertainment and it set the meaning of Christmas and the time frame a bit more strongly in all our minds.
Don’t let “traditions” rule over you…if they just can’t be done, or will not work for you, let them go. If you can revive one on an occasional basis, great--if you can’t--LET IT GO! If you can’t celebrate Christmas on Christmas--find another day that works--it’s the spirit of Christmas and the Birth of OUR SAVIOUR we celebrate--not a day on the calendar!
Recommended Reading: The Christmas Tree Book
author: Philip V. Snyder
This is a wonderful book to read before the coming holidays. It is full of wonderful photos.
It may even help you identify some of your grandmother's ornaments. This is not a price guide.
It is a history of everything on the tree, the tree itself, and under the tree. You will see how the wars affected the production and distribution of beautiful glass balls, metal reflectors, lights, etc.
It will even explain why the production of the light bulb influenced our tree decorations, and NOT just with electric lights. It covers many countries, England, Germany, France, Japan,Italy and the US. This is one of my favorite books for Christmas Tree history........
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